Friday, March 1, 2013

Young Adult (2011).

replayability: 6
dialogue: 6
music: 6
ambience: 7
characters: 8
TOTAL: 33

I only have 10% battery so I'm going to blog until the computer dies. LIVIN' ON THE EDGE! I need a drink. Why am I not drinking yet during a blog/movie marathon? That's crazy. Hold on...

I knew when I first saw the DVD menu sequence that this movie was for me. The colorful cassette, the dirty stereo buttons, the grungy fingernails. I'm all over it. Charlize Theron is an amazing actress. I respect her a lot. This movie really makes me feel better about not being a typically pretty girl, getting to see Charlize tear off latex pasties, put hairpieces and fake lashes and tons of foundation on her face is encouraging to someone that doesn't do much beauty maintenance at all and looks ok. If I spent as much time getting ready as this chick, I might be fuckin' smokin', too! It could happen...

Like Jenna Marbles, the YouTube star? Out of makeup, she looks sort of nerdy and sweet, but then you get her in the wing-tipped liquid liner, the lashes and the foundation, and she's breathtaking. Beauty is an effort, as we've seen with drag queens. I recently saw a picture of a friend of mine in pasties. I was not only inspired by her ballsiness posting that on the internet, but it was also encouraging to see that her breasts were less-than-perfect and not as large as normally advertised. You can have cleavage no matter how small your breasts are. How cool is that? I used to be against artifice in physical appearance and I'm still not really ok with plastic surgery, but really, if whatever you're doing makes you feel sexy (fake hair, water bra, three pairs of false eyelashes), then do it! I'm flirting with the idea of extreme cleavage, myself. And I'm warming up to false eyelashes and heels. So off topic and I'm at 4% now, too.

It's sort of redundant posting about these movies because I'm only analyzing the ones that are on my top 20 list. Every sentence begins with "I love how..."

Ok, switched to the iPad so you don't have to worry about my battery percentage anymore, 'cause I know you were just biting your nails about it. Several people commented in reviews on this movie that Patton Oswalt basically plays himself, bla bla bla. And perhaps he is, but Patton Oswalt is awesome. It's ok to be a character actor. You don't have to be super versatile. Being super versatile is also a great trait in an actor, but being Patton Oswalt works for him. Babies ARE boring. Thanks for saying that, Charlize. I'm sure babies aren't boring to breeders, and I know and love a lot of breeders AND babies. I love my niece and my nephew and my Bella, but that's probably all the baby-love I've got in me.

Another woman in a life-crisis story. I love self-destruction, she says as she sucks down another swig of cranberry-vodka. I don't ever really remember caring in high school whether or not I was popular, but I still get sick satisfaction out of seeing stories wherein the popular girls and boys are total fuckups as adults. Only in fiction, though. I would honestly feel empathy for almost any of the popular kids from my own high school I saw heading down a dark, sad road. I'd still have a small smirk hidden in my empathy, but just a small one, really.

That's hearbreaking to realize that the song you thought was "your song" with someone is their song with someone else too, or that they associate it with that other person exclusively and not with you. But this is how music is...what I considered a love song at 18 I consider a love song now, for the most part. "Apart" breaks your heart just as much during the third big breakup of your life as it did the first.

I can't even imagine what it must have been like for the popular kids back in school. Was it like being famous? Is real life difficult after being the famous of popularity? I mean, how do you turn out without all that pain and angst in your formative years? I dated a former athletic popular kid once and he was kind of like Charlize in this movie. An addict, uncertain, weird, still thinking of himself as this invincible creature. I wonder if many former-popular people suffer from a distorted sense of reality.

There's NO WAY her freakin' car works after all this time! And there's also no way her room is still the same. I mean, does this really happen, ever? That people's childhood bedrooms are kept as a time capsule? For some reason, this movie makes me want to be stylish and pretend to be ok even when I'm not. Perhaps I'll have a breakdown like Kristen or Charlize. This is my mental health year, goddamnit, and I deserve to ruin a civilized garden party too!

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