Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Wrecked.

episode 110.
airdate: 27 Nov 2001.

Cartoons. Buffy and Willow didn't come home all night.

Buffy wakes up freaked out. Spike seems pretty calm. His life of Slayer killing leads to his first Slayer-doing. Yeah, I said that. I'm crude. She calls him convenient. Hurts his feelings. He taunts her a bit, she punches him, almost has sex with him again, not all in that order. Tara makes Dawn pancakes as they wait to see if they should call around to find B and W. Willow walks in the door with Amy. Willow explains "Amy the rat", you know, not Amy the Date. And then Amy starts going on and on about all the spells Willow did the night before. Buffy comes in all "sore and limpy". Limpy? Really? They did it THAT much? Amy leaves to go visit her dad. Buffy and Willow both decide to go to bed. Willow tries to make her curtains shut with magic, but she's all drained, so she has to get up to shut them. Poor Willow.

Ah! Anya is all bleach blond. Weird. Back at the magic shop they're still trying to research who robbed the museum. Xander again warns about Willow hanging out with Amy and Buffy defends her, again overidentifying.

Willow and Amy go out again the next night and W is whining about how wiped she was after the night before and Amy suggests going to some crazy warlock dude that knows spells with "no burnout". How the hell does she know some underground warlock guy when she's been a rat for three years?! Not terribly believable, but ok. It's this invisible crack house in the middle of an alley. The guy, "Rack", is drawn to Willow and her power. He wants something in return for the spells, just a little glimpse into her mind apparently. It's really creepy. Then there's druggy music and Willow is on the ceiling. Willow later wakes up in her house, not knowing how she got home. She cries in the shower.

Willow offers to buy Dawn dinner and a movie.

When B gets home later she hears something upstairs and finds Amy rifling through Willow's stuff. She broke in to steal spell stuff. Amy mentions Willow is probably at Rack's and B shakes info out of her about how she has to "feel" out the place. B goes to get Spike to help her find it. Willow takes Dawn to Rack's. Dawn ends up waiting for a really long time. They miss the movie.

Willow finally emerges and she's all high and her eyes are black. Willow wants to go do something "grown-up" and makes fun of Dawn when she says she just wants to go home. Willow and Dawn run into a demon that Willow summoned with her magic. They steal a car to get away and Willow drives it with magic, laughing, no hand on the wheel. They run into a pole or something. Dawn wakes up first after the accident and has to fight the demon herself, which she does by hiding under the car and screaming. Buffy and Spike are nearby and go help her. So B is literally fighting Willow's demons for her at this point. She HAS to admit what Willow is doing now. B screwing Spike really isn't as bad. She's choosing to have sex with someone. Yeah, he's a killer, etc, but they do have a lot in common. They've both spent their years fighting and killing and lamenting. She's neglecting her friends and family, yes, but what she's actually doing with that time is not so terrible. B is having a hard time killing the demon. Suddenly he burns into ash as Willow sparks behind the disintegrated body. Maybe she was the only one who could kill the thing she created with her magic?

B and Spike help Dawn up to take her to the hospital (her wrist is broken, I think) and they're ignoring Willow as she pleads with Dawn, telling her she's so sorry. Dawn slaps her. She collapses on the floor and they almost just leave her like that, but B goes back. Tells her to "get up". Confronts her about almost killing Dawn. Willow says she can't stop and she needs help. I think we're supposed to think she's the strong one here because she asks for help.

Buffy goes in to see Willow later. Willow keeps saying she's sorry. B tells her she doesn't need magic to be special. That Tara loves her. Willow is worried she's just "some girl" without the magic. She decides "no more spells". She says "It's over." and B agreees...overidentifying again. B puts up a bunch of garlic and sleeps with a cross to try to quiell HER addiction. So she's addicted to hot vampire sex...big deal.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Smashed.

episode 109.
airdate: 20 Nov 2001.

Buffy is saving peeps from a mugging and Buffy is telling Spike "never again" you know, again. Spike is being mean, telling her she's a tease and an ice queen and that she has no one but him, etc. Nice and abusive there, Spike.

Willow suddenly realizes she can bring Amy back. Fucking FINALLY. Jesus! The troika are stealing stuff from a museum. They get caught by the security guard and freeze-ray him. For reals.

Amy doesn't realize how long it's been. She says it feels like weeks that she was in the cage. It was, in reality, 3 years. Buffy almost tells Willow about Spike, but then Amy comes in and that distracts her. Amy is watching TV when B notices the freeze-ray news story and goes to investigate, of course. Spike tags along, like he does. They come to blows. When Spike hits B he notices it didn't activate his chip. So he goes to find a girl to eat. When he tries, it doesn't work.

Tara and Dawn are hanging out. Willow does a creepy spell to read the internet in a trance. They find out that the thing taken from the museum was a crystal. Spike breaks into the troika's lair, intimidating them into checking out the functionality of his chip. He uses a figurine of Boba Fett as hostage. Ha ha.

Amy talks Willow into going out. Warren reveals, after doing lots of tests, that Spike's chip works fine. Dawn and Tara get back from their day out and Tara hangs out with Dawn watching TV. Amy and Willow are playing pool with magic instead of pool cues. Amy bewitches a chick to hit on Willow, but Willow calls her off. The guys that danced with Amy act like asses, so they turn them into cage dancers in their undies. Xander tries to talk to B about Willow's out of control magic stuff and Buffy's internalizing too much, as per usual.

Spike calls B wanting her to meet him in the cemetery. Now that he knows his chip works, he knows Buffy is the one that's wrong. He was trying to be intimidating, but it was just funny. Spike catches up with her and they fight. He reveals the chip doesn't work with B. Tells her she "came back wrong." They're fighting a lot now.

Amy and Willow are changing things to their liking at the Bronze. Changing the male rock band to chick alternative and all kinds of other stuff.

Spike and B are in an abandoned house beating each other up now. Insulting each other. They're wrecking the house. These two scenes are going back and forth. Both Willow and B are going to the dark side tonight. The fighting turns into fucking. The house is coming down around them and it's very graphic, actually. Neither of them even remove clothing, Spike just unzips and B is wearing a skirt, so they go for it. I get it. B wants to feel something. After all this time, it would be odd if she didn't give into him.

Commentary (by Drew Greenberg) notes added 5.7.13:

Drew Greenberg is a superfan. This is the first episode of Buffy he'd written. He helps with the continuity of the entire series from this point on.

This is the first episode after Willow and Tara's breakup and we see that Tara is stronger after the breakup than before. She becomes more herself alone. Something I'd noticed unconsciously in the way that I liked her more without Willow. She was more self-assured and robust.

Originally, instead of the frat boys at the Bronze ending up dancing in gold lame shorts, Drew wanted to have them makeout with each other. Joss said he didn't want to do that for two reasons: 1) because he didn't want to give the impression that a person's sexuality could change with the snap of a witch's fingers, and 2) he also didn't want to convey in any way that kissing another man would be a punishment (for how they had treated Willow). Good on Joss. Yet another reason this is one of the best shows ever, and that might be the only worthy tidbit I get from this commentary.

Buffy and Spike are two lost characters that are both MORE than human and have always had a relationship of violence. That their sex would evolve from a knock-down-drag-out makes perfect sense. That Spike would eventually attempt to rape her also makes perfect sense. Theirs is a relationship beget of violence until season 7, the way it began in season 2. The sex is pretty hot.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Tabula Rasa.

episode 108.
airdate: 13 Nov 2001.

Buffy in cemetery...runs into Spike. Spike wants to talk about the kiss and B is being avoid-y, of course. She's wearing all white, like she's trying to be pure as the driven snow and shit. A shark-headed dude that seems like a mob-leader shows up to hound Spike for kitten-poker debt. Ah, she's wearing leather pants with a white sweater set thing. The attempt at purity with a base of shiny black darkness.

Tara, Willow, Xander and Anya are having dinner together. Anya is wondering what it was like for Buffy in heaven. Willow is feeling guilt and Tara is comforting everyone. Tara is always the voice of reason. Xander feels weird to feel weird about his friend not being dead. Willow suggests doing a spell for Buffy to forget she was in heaven. Tara gets upset and they fight. Finally confronts her about the spell she used to make Tara forget the last fight they had about magic. She asks "How could you violate my mind like that after what Glory did to me?" She says a lot of very insightful things. Willow whines after Tara starts to break up with her and says she'll go a month without magic, says she doesn't need magic, just Tara. Tara asks her to go a week and then "we'll see". It's definitely not an ultimatum, because Tara seems unsure even making that assertion. She suggests they take some space.

Giles is telling B he needs to go back to England. Buffy is throwing a fit. "I've taught you all I can about being the Slayer and your mother taught you what you needed to know about life. You're not going to trust that unless you're forced to stand alone." Amen, Giles. I HATEHATEHATE to see him go, but if more parents said this to their children, we'd have a lot more self-sufficient human beings in this world. She storms out, but Giles remains strong, because he's a stud.

The next morning Willow immediately does a spell to get dressed super quick and another forgetting spell for Tara and Buffy, to get Tara to forget she's mad at her and Buffy to forget heaven, of course. "Tabula Rasa" (blank slate) she chants. The spell takes a bit to take effect, so they're all at the magic shop talking when it happens....to all of them instead of just Tara and Buffy. Buffy's in the middle of a dramatic speech (as Giles is trying to delicately tell them all he's leaving again) when they all pass out for several hours possibly, because it's dark when they wake up. No one knows who they are. Anya and Giles are leaning on each other and Anya has the ring, so they think they must be engaged. Willow is wearing a jacket that belongs to Xander so they think they might be together. Spike is wearing a weird tweed suit as a disguise because he was hiding from the mob-shark dude, so he thinks he's Giles' son because they kind of hate each other and are both British. B instinctively sticks with Dawn and takes care of her. Willow and Tara are still attracted to each other.

Giles calls magic "chicanery". Dawn has a necklace with her name on it. Spike thinks his name is Randy because that's what his suit says on the inside. Anya finds the papers that show her and Giles own the shop together. Xander, Willow, and Tara all had IDs on them. Buffy names herself Joan. Dawn makes fun of the name and they annoy each other, so then decide they're sisters. Some monsters are at the door. They scream and hide. Joan discovers she can kick ass and dust vamps. Xander passes out. Joan tells everyone their jobs, as per usual. Randy decides he's a superhero too, but he's vamp-faced and oblivious to it. Joan runs away from him after seeing vamp-face. Giles finds the one-way airline ticket in his pocket, so he thinks he's leaving Anya. Randy decides he's a noble vampire, a "vampire with a soul", since he doesn't want to bite Joan and is fighting other vampires. Joan says, "A vampire with a soul? How lame is that?"

Anya is trying to help with spells, but she just keeps making bunnies, which she's scared of with amnesia too. Bunnies all over the shop. So cute. Giles is swordfighting a skeleton. Anya is making a mess of the spells. They're fighting, hits Giles over the head with a book. Giles says "no wonder I'm leaving you!" Anya throws the ring. After Giles fixes everything he apologizes to Anya. They kiss and make up. Tara and Willow almost kiss.

Xander accidentally steps on the crystal that was part of the spell, so now everyone is back to normal. Tara pushes Willow away from her in anger, immediately knowing what she has done. Buffy gets confused for a second and knocked down by a vamp while Spike takes care of everything. Anya and Giles push away from each other with disgust.

Xander is with Willow, Tara, and Dawn in a tunnel for some reason and tries to laugh it off to break the tension, but they all wordlessly know it was Willow. It's so sad that no one even confronts her. It's like they've all accepted how alone they are and how fucked everything is. Tara is obviously done with Willow, though she looks very sad. Buffy is really sad. There's sad Michelle Branch at the Bronze, where B is moping. Tara is packing up at the house. It would take incredible strength to leave everything familiar like that and move on.

Giles is leaving without any goodbyes. Everyone is so alone. Spike tries to comfort B, but she turns her face away from him. Dawn is very upset that Tara is leaving.

Apparently, B went after Spike, because they're making out at the end.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Once More, With Feeling.

 episode 107.
airdate: 7 Nov 2001.

Tara discovers the dried flower Willow used to make her forget the night before. The first song is B in the cemetery singing about how she's "going through the motions". I love Buffy's deadpan voice. It really sounds lifeless, whether that was on purpose because of the character, or just tone-deafness on the part of Sarah Michelle Gellar. Whatever it is, it's perfect.

"She does pretty well with fiends from hell, but lately we can tell she's just going through the motions."

Breathtaking opening number. Buffy asks everyone at the magic shop if they burst into song this morning. They all did. "It seemed perfectly normal." "I've got a theory...it could be bunnies." Anya does an awesome rock number about bunnies. Anya asks (after the number) if it's just them. Buffy looks outside and people are singing and dancing about dry cleaning outside. Dawn gets back from school.

Dawn: You'll never guess what happened today in math class?

Buffy: (no one looks up) Everyone started singing and dancing?

Dawn: (disappointed she couldn't tell her story) No, I gave birth to a pteradactyl.

Anya: Oh my God, did it sing?

Willow and Tara escape to go do it. Tara sings to Willow about being "under her spell". Tara looks so pretty in a minty corset and olive green dress. 

There's some serious innuendo throughout the song ("spread beneath my willow tree"). Exactly how they would have portrayed a straight couple, so it really shouldn't be shocking to anyone, but I bet there was an uproar of some kind at the time. I don't care enough to check, but I'm sure there was.

Dawn thinks the whole thing is romantic. "What's gotta be wrong with that?" Cut to a dude tap-dancing until he spontaneously combusts, of course. The next morning Anya and Xander sing about how much they love each other and their hesitations they're keeping from one another.

Anya and Xander whine to Giles about their tune and Giles tells them about the spontaneous combustion. They talk about Buffy too and as they're walking through town you see all kinds of fun dancing in the background. Later, Buffy goes to see Spike and he tries to kick her out real quick. He's avoiding breaking into song. Then he does when she doesn't leave immediately. He sings to her to leave her alone if she's not going to give in to her feelings for him. "If my heart could beat it would break my chest!" This episode is so much fun, even though they're all imploding and singing about sad stuff. 

Tara updates Dawn: there's some kind of Lord of the Dance, but "not the scary one...just a demon." They're doing more research. Dawn tells Tara she's glad her and Willow made up. Tara says they didn't fight. She starts to put it together that maybe they did fight, but W made her forget. Bitch! Tara leaves to go confront Willow, leaving Dawn alone. She fondles some of her stolen goods and starts singing, "Does anybody even notice? Does anybody even care?" She gets kidnapped and ballet dances in some undisclosed location with wooden-faced dudes.

Then the demon above shows up. He wants her to be his queen. He's the Lord of the Dance dude. He's all smooth jazz. "All these melodies go on too long..." Dawn reveals her sister's the Slayer. He sends his wood-faced guys to find her because he wants to "see her burn". Giles is singing to Buffy as they're training about how he's holding her back, enabling her. That he knows he needs to leave her. Tara shows up to research the flower, to see if it really did make her forget. She eventually joins Giles' song. Neither of them want to leave their women, but they know they should. Tara and Giles are probably the strongest singers, so their song is very powerful. The wooden-faced boy tells B the demon is going to take her sis to the Underworld and he wants B. Xander suggests going with her, but Giles thinks she should face it alone. Spike tries to go, but Buffy rebuffs him. Buffy sings some more about wanting the "fire back" and "walking through the fire". Spike is singing about the "torch I bear is scorching me--I'm free if that bitch dies! I better help her out." They all end up going to help her after all, singing about togetherness and walking through the fire, though they're all so separated. 

Buffy makes a deal. If she can't kill the demon, he can take her to hell instead. Buffy starts singing about how life's a show. Everyone shows up as she's singing about how pointless life is. Giles says, "She needs backup...Anya, Tara..." and they go and back her up, dancing! Priceless! Buffy reveals in her song that she was in heaven when she died. Willow is horrified. Buffy starts smoking...Spike saves her as everyone else is staring in horror after her revelation. Spike sings that life isn't supposed to be bliss..."it's living". The way he sings "living" is the same way B sang "heaven" and it's eery and minor-chordy and deadpan and AWESOME. 

Turns out Dawn accidentally summoned demon dude by stealing the amulet from the shop. Somehow Xander has something to do with it too. The demon disappears. All the secrets are out. Dawn begins the last number: "Where do we go from here?" "Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear." Spike suddenly realizes he's singing with everyone and says "Bugger this." and leaves. Buffy follows him and the ep ends with them kissing passionately in the alley after B sings "This isn't real, but I just want to feel".

The End.

Commentary (by Joss Whedon) notes added 5.7.13:

Buffy's first song is described here as a "Disney 'I want'" song, one like Ariel's "A Whole New World" wherein the heroine describes exactly what she's missing in her life. 

The scene wherein everyone explains they're in a musical at the Magic Box was meant to connect the characters with the audience. People are putoff by musicals, and this doesn't exclude our beloved Scoobies. Joss here explains the song wherein B is rousing the troops, but also simultaneously NOT feeling it. Being bored and Giles being the last to be convinced of her speech...the song was to woo Giles into thinking she's ok. 

The line Anya sings in her number with Xander, "Will I look good when I've gotten old?" was supposed to be about whether Xander would still love her when she's old, not about her vanity. Ah. That makes more sense because that line bothered me before, since this is a feminist show and it's not usual for Joss to portray the characters as worrying about how they look. 

James Marsters is a songwriter and musician IRL. Nice. Joss is talking about how musicals need to further the plot. That this episode is like a continuation of "Hush" in that when you stop talking you start saying something. Joss is also expressing something that I find rather important (God, the commentaries with him at the helm really are the important/worthy ones): the fact that the more restrictions you have when writing, the more things are sort of done for you. Michelle Trachtenberg wanted to dance and sing as little as possible, so he created her role in the episode based around that. Alyson Hanigan didn't want to sing at all and Amber Benson has a phenomenal voice, so he wrote to everyone's strengths. I think that's one of the things that makes him such an incredible writer, because he writes FOR his muses and works with their attributes and is able to recognize the attributes of one-off bits like James' and Jonathan's. Because he recognizes and works within his actors' strengths and limitations. 

Didn't realize the scenes with the bad guy are in the Bronze. Thematically, the scene wherein Giles is singing to Buffy as they train wherein she's in slow motion, but he's not, is about how she's in her own universe so much, that she's in her own time-speed as well. That makes sense to me. I feel like I have my own time too...that it passes differently for me. I'm slower, it's faster. A day off is never long enough for me. I know, "Nobody likes their job, nobody had enough sleep." 

They didn't kill the bad guy in this episode because he "represents something you can't kill off". He settles into the air around them and what he did (got them all to say things they weren't previously saying) cannot be undone.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: All the Way.

episode 106.
airdate: 30 Oct 2001.

Halloween episode. Xander is a pirate, Anya is a Charlie's Angel, and Giles is a wizard.

Dawn is stealing things from the shop again. It's super busy.  Spike is lurking in the basement.

There's a humming old man walking into his house with scary music. He's making something for the kids for Halloween and he's all creepy. Everyone's exhausted after the Halloween rush at the store. As Xander and Buffy are watching Anya and Dawn doing the dance of "capitalist superiority" at the cash register, Xander says, "I'm gonna marry that girl" and Buffy says, "Ew, she's 15, and my sister!" Did Joss already know they'd be together later? This is the second time I've wondered that. And he'd only be 20 or 21 at this point, so it's really not that gross that he's only 5 years older than her. It makes more sense than I thought it would. And the eye patch? He definitely knew about Xander's eye, which WHYWHYWHY hasn't Willow fixed that yet? She can bring B back from the dead, but can't fix Xander's eye or turn Amy back into a human? WTF? Ok, foreshadowing/spoiler rant endeth.

So, this is the moment he finally announces their engagement...finally. They have a little engagement party. Willow does magic to decorate for the party. Giles and Tara both disapprove. Tara says, "Why use magic when you can do something naturally?" They fight. Dawn sees and Willow says, "We're done." Bitch! You don't get to declare a fight over. Tara SOO needs to leave her. Dawn is going out with friends. Yeay, Dawn has friends. She tells them she's doing something that she isn't, I can't remember what. She's supposed to be staying the night with a friend and that friend told her mom she's staying at Dawn's. They're meeting the friend's bf and his friend. They're doing typical mean teenager Halloween stuff. It's lame. They end up at that old man's house. He's creepy according to the neighborhood, so knocking on the door is apparently a dare-type activity. He invites them in. The boys insist. He used to be a toy designer. He has treats for them and keeps calling himself "Daddy". He's creepy and everything, but the real danger is that the two boys are vampires. One of them kills the old man in the kitchen. They run out and the girls don't yet know they're vamps.

Xander is looking really nervous talking with everyone about "life plans". Buffy comforts him on the porch. "I'm wallowing, not drowning" says Xander. Buffy goes to patrol with Spike. The vamp that ate the old guy is macking on Dawn and he seems super sweet. Gives her his coat when she's cold, etc. Buffy sees an ambulance taking away a woman with a vamp-bite as she's on her way to find Spike. Dawn's friend's mom calls and tells Giles they did the "round Robin" thing of staying the night, etc. Giles tells everyone, dispenses a plan. Dawn is super nervous, hanging out in the car (a car the other vamp-dude stole) with one of the vamps. They kiss. Her first kiss.

Tara and Willow go to the Bronze to look for Dawn. Willow wants to do a spell to shift everyone that isn't a 15-year old girl into another dimension, but Tara stops her and they start fighting again. Willow mutes the crowd so they can fight in a cone of silence. Tara says, "What do you want me to do? Just keep my mouth shut?" Willow says yes. Bitch!

It's out that they're vamps and Dawn and Jenna are officially in danger. When B gets to Spike's he tells her Dawn's missing, as Giles has already gotten to him. He's in the cemetery when he hears screaming. It's Janet (Dawn's friend), the vamp is chewing on her. He says "she was asking for it". Giles says "I feel certain she wasn't." Awesome. Janet has been portrayed (as far as how she's dressed and the fact that she's a "bad girl" type, though she never acted stupid or stereotypically slutty) as the type a guy would say "asked for it" so this is a good time for commentary on how a women is NEVER asking for it. Yeay for that little moment. Giles fights and kills the vamp. Dawn is being bewitched by her vamp when Giles shows up. A whole bunch of other vamps show up at that moment. Giles and Dawn are surrounded. That's when Spike and B show up. Buffy yells at Dawn. They all fight. Giles stakes two in a row, super hot. Buffy decapitates one with a car door. Dawn and her vamp are alone and you think Dawn is in peril, but she stakes him with a pencil. Giles suggests discipline for Dawn, for lying to them and B thanks him for taking care of it and goes up to bed. Giles does talk to her.

Willow and Tara fight some more. Tara wants to sleep, gets into bed mad and Willow does a spell to make her forget. Bitch! I'm so mad at Willow. So mad.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Life Serial.

episode 105.
airdate: 23 Oct 2001.

Buffy brings home dinner and everyone has already eaten. They are super nice and eat a little of the chicken she brought anyway. She's just gotten back from seeing Angel. They met somewhere in the middle of L.A. and Sunnydale, so I don't think anyone knows what happened between them on this visit (it wasn't on Angel either, is what I mean). Buffy doesn't want to talk about it, anyway. Everyone (Giles, Dawn, Willow, and Tara) asks Buffy what she's going to do with her life. Tara and Willow suggest her auditing the remainder of the semester before registration starts for the next semester. The troika (which is what my "The Complete Slayer" book keeps calling them) are planning something to do with messing with Buffy and Andrew is painting the Death Star on their van.

Social Construction of Reality: two opposing theories- one stressing the independence and externality of social reality from individuals and the other that each individual participates fully in the construction of his or her own life. Ok. I had to put on subtitles because everyone was talking too fast there. Is this essentially nature versus nurture? "Social phenomena don't have unproblematic objective existences. They have to be interpreted and given meanings by those who encounter them." Yeah. We control how we see things.

If Buffy were not an active participant in her life, she wouldn't be bested so easily by Jonathan, Warren, and Andrew.

Warren runs into B in the hallway putting some kind of device on her. Oh, that last part was Buffy being in sociology class with Willow. She's following Tara to another class. After handing her a book, Buffy looks at it and then several minutes have passed in an instant. It keeps happening. It's odd that Tara keeps wandering off as Buffy is obviously spacing out as time passes strangely to her. She finds the device and the boys make it self-destruct. Jonathan and Andrew score him on the "screwing with Buffy" category. They're each taking turns, apparently. The next day (or later that day--something) Buffy goes to work with Xander on the construction site. The construction dudes are very condescending to her and she lifts a beam that's several hundred pounds in front of them. Andrew makes B fight some demons. Makes everyone think she's crazy. She destroys a bunch of equipment. The demons melted when she killed them. They all deny they saw anything, so I don't know if they didn't or if they're being asses. They were sexist asses the entire time she was there, calling her "sweety" and teasing her that she might "break a nail". Michael says this is cheesy that Joss is trying to make them sound sexist, but I said, "No, it's really like that sometimes." He was appropriately appalled. I heart my husband.

Giles goes into research mode to see who's messing with Buffy. Jonathan's turn to mess with her. She's in the magic shop now helping out to see if she wants to be retail girl, 'cause Xander had to fire her from construction. Jonathan puts her in a time loop. The unsatisfiable customer. She eventually figures it out, but she quits.

Decides to get drunk with Spike. "Life is stupid." Every time Buffy takes a shot she makes the cutest noise/face. I love it. Spike takes her to a demon bar...they go to the back to question the demons that are playing poker, betting with kittens. The troika decide they're tied, so there's a final death round, but they can't decide what to do, so they're just watching B from outside the bar. First sighting of Clem! The boys are fighting over who's the best Bond when Buffy discovers their van. Buffy drunkenly fights Jonathan with a glamour that makes him look like a stereotypical devil. He runs away.

Buffy's at home after a lot of puking. Buffy tells Giles she's screwing up. Giles gives her a check. She says it makes her feel safe "knowing you're always gonna be here." He looks sad and disapproving when she walks out of the room to tell Dawn about the check.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Flooded.

episode104.
airdate: 16 Oct 2001.

Buffy appears to be hunting for something. Turns out it's a leaky pipe. Dawn is offering to call the plumber, but Buffy thinks she can fix it. After tightening a pipe, the basement floods. They need all new pipes. Willow and Xander break it to Buffy that she is almost out of money. Her mom's life insurance was pretty much out after paying all her medical bills. Stupid medical bills. Way to make someone who's already poor even poorer. I live in fear of medical bills. Anya suggests Buffy charge people for her services of saving the world and stuff. "You can't charge innocent people for saving their lives!" Um, that's what medical bills ARE. Anya is still mad at Xander for not letting them tell everyone they're engaged. He has a big speech about how being a husband and being married is a big deal and he wants each step to be perfect. They kiss and it's super sweet and then Anya yells at him for constantly distracting her. She's ready to get their lives started. I don't blame her for this. They've been engaged for like six months at this point and Xander still doesn't want to tell everyone? I should have seen "Hell's Bells" coming, is all I'm sayin'. God, that's an episode I do not want to watch.

Buffy is applying for a loan. They won't give it to her because she has no income. A demon comes into the bank after they refuse her and she saves them, but the demon gets away with money. A police officer tries to help, but fails. There's another profession wherein a person gets paid to save your life, potentially, anyway. Who knows if they ever really do. Or probably not as often as they should, anyway. I'm cranky at the beginning of my writing marathon today...

Buffy is punching a bag a lot. Willow notices she's mad and is pleased because she's having a feeling. She's been really apathetic since she's been back. Dawn finds the demon during research. Everyone is trying to keep her from research, which is ridiculous because she's 15, the same age Buffy was when she was called. Buffy is explaining her fight with the demon when Giles walks in. He hasn't seen her yet since she's resurrected. It's intense. They hug. She seems happier to see him than she's been since she got back. It's very touching. The kind of touching I can stand. Man, I wish I had a Giles. How cool would it be to have a sane, awesome father figure? Seriously, if anyone knows, could you describe it to me in lurid detail so I can live vicariously? My dad was not mature enough to be a dad. And every bf my mom had was either not mature enough as well or an asshole. Ooh, there's my Papa though. He's totally a Giles. Ok, so I have a Giles...he's just not as forthcoming with the affection as the onscreen one. That's ok. Oh, jeez. This is going to be drifting-off-into-Stephanie's-subconscious day, isn't it?

Giles and Buffy talk alone in the training room. Giles is bewildered. He tells her she looks tired. She tells him "Sleeping is hard. You know, because of the whole waking up in a box thing...I sleep great even, except for the dreams..." He tells her he's proud of her.

When he gets back from talking with her, they update him on the new demon. Apparently Mmm'Fashnik is a demon that does mayhem for money. It's Warren, Jonathan, and another guy, Andrew. The demon threatens to kill them all. They bargain with him.

Buffy is putting Giles up for the night. It's so mean that they let Giles leave...sell his awesome place, sign over his shop...etc. Giles reassures her they'll work out all the bills in the morning. The Trio needs to kill the Slayer in order to appease the demon. Jonathan and Andrew don't want to, but Warren is pushing it. The Trios "mission" is to take over Sunnydale. Their to do list states: Control the Weather, Miniaturize Fort Knox, Conjure Fake I.D.s, Shrink Ray, Girls, Girls, and The Gorilla Thing. They're the comic relief in a season where the main characters torture themselves for a year. Reversal of roles thing. Although the Big Bads are always hilarious, in their own ways. They decide not to kill Buffy, but Warren gives the demon Buffy's name and address behind their backs.

The first time Willow and Giles are alone together, Willow is looking for approval and validation, but Giles says, "You're a very stupid girl." He trusted her to respect the forces of nature. "There are others in this world that can do what you did, you just wouldn't want to meet them." Willow is arrogant. Giles tells her she was lucky. Calls her a "rank, arrogant, amateur." She gets real mean for a second, then apologizes. I totally understand where she's going, why she has to lose Tara. Tara is too good for her at this point in her development. If she never went dark at the end of this season, she never would have been able to reign in her power and learn to harness it properly. Spike and Buffy are overhearing the fight from the backyard. B tells Spike she feels like she's spending all her time "trying to be ok" so no one worries. God, I know what that's like!  They sit in companionable silence on the back steps, like they do.

The demon breaks in in the middle of the night. She, for the first time, laments the destruction of her house as her and the demon are destroying it. She take him to the flooded basement where they won't destroy anything else. She beats him to death with a pipe. The Trio adds "Hypnotize Buffy" to their list. They're nerdy-goodness. Well, Andrew and Jonathan are, anyway. Buffy wonders how her mother put the house back together after all the times she destroyed it. FINALLY! I am always so distracted by house destruction during fighting scenes. Giles reassures Buffy she can be a grownup and handle crises, just like her mom did.

Angel calls. She "has to go now". She basically bails in the middle of cleaning up the house and dealing with bills etc.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: After Life.

episode 103.
airdate: 9 Oct 2001.

Anya, Xander, Willow, and Tara decide to head back to B's house...surely she'll be there. Dawn has taken her home, cleans her up. Spike shows up at the house.

He notices her hands right away. Dawn says she doesn't know how they got like that and Spike says "I do." She was gone five months. Everyone else shows up, asking her all kinds of questions. Dawn has to tell them to back off. She goes to bed after telling everyone she's ok, though she doesn't look it. Spike is upset that they didn't tell him. Spike warns that with magic there are always consequences. Willow tells Tara she was expecting Buffy to thank her. Always with the unreasonable expectations, Willow. Calm down.

An apparition of Buffy yells at Tara and Willow and throws a crystal ball at them in the middle of the night. When they turn on the light, the ball isn't broken and Buffy is gone. They call Xander/Anya. As Xander is on the phone, Anya comes in the room with white eyes cutting her face with a knife. Her face is not really cut.

They're in research-mode at the magic shop.  Buffy needs to get out...too much stimuli. Dawn is possessed now in the magic shop and breathes fire. Buffy goes to see Spike. It's probably comforting being quiet in the darkness of Spike's place. Spike expresses regret at not protecting Dawn before her blood was shed that night. Tells B he fantasized about saving her.

Xander finally suggests the spell they did is causing consequences. Asks Tara if Willow might have known this might happen. They should all know! There's ALWAYS consequences. A demon was made by the spell. It's trying to become corporeal. They think they can't destroy it without undoing the spell. They discover the demon will dissipate unless it kills Buffy. So it goes to kill her, 'cause it overheard.

Buffy can't fight it 'cause it's all misty and noncorporeal and stuff. Willow and Tara are doing a spell to make the demon real so Buffy can kill it. Expecting Buffy to kill things both of her first two nights back. So unreasonable.

Buffy makes Dawn lunch for school and is acting a bit more normal. Buffy tells everyone thank you for bringing her back. Tells them she was in hell. They all hug her. She goes outside to be alone after and Spike is there in the alley. She tells him the truth, that she was in heaven (warm, loved, complete), but that they can never know. After she drops that bomb on him, she walks away.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Bargaining (Parts 1 & 2).

episodes 101 & 102.
airdate: 2 Oct 2001.

At this point the show had moved to UPN which played in my town late at night on some other channel (I didn't actually have UPN, is what I mean). I hadn't been able to watch Buffy since the end of season 3, and this was before Hulu, of course, so I had missed a LOT. I don't even know if they had the DVDs out yet for seasons 4 and 5, but I started watching again during season six. I think I might've known before I started watching that Buffy was dead, but I can't remember. Anyway, I had just graduated high school and I would have seen these two episodes the day before my 19th birthday. I'm just two years younger than Buffy. As she resurrects, she's 20 as I was still (barely) 18. I do kind of feel like I grew up with Buffy. This particular season I was at the tail end of a really terrible, abusive relationship and I identified with what was going on a LOT. I even nicknamed my asshole boyfriend Spike in my LiveJournal blog, if that tells you anything, and it SHOULD. Anyway, I cried a lot watching the darkest season of Buffy ever then, and I will again. Here we go.

Episode begins with a typical vamp chase through the cemetery. Tara, Spike, and Giles. Willow starts talking to them in their minds. Buffy puns. Together they eventually kill the vamp, but it takes all of them to do it. There's another, Buffy gets this one. "That'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!" It's the bot, of course. They're trying to maintain that the Slayer is still alive, so the beasties are scared and stuff. But like, what about her tombstone? I guess maybe if the beasties don't know her name. Tara and Willow are living with Dawn and the Buffybot is making sandwiches. Apparently, dad doesn't know Buffy is dead. They're not revealing it even to Dawn's school, so that way Dawn doesn't get taken away by Social Services. Again, wouldn't her obit have been in the paper? And then there's her gravestone in the Sunnydale cemetery? Ok, I'll suspend belief. Buffybot has to go to the school for a PTA thing or orientation or something. Everyone is worried about her performance at the school function, but who's going to suspect she's a robot? They'd just think she's weird.

Giles is preparing to leave Sunnydale and is leaving the store to Anya. Anya is stressed because Giles keeps "almost" going, then he doesn't and she keeps "almost" being in charged, but then she's not and "maybe he shouldn't even be going anyway, but we're not supposed to talk about that"...Xander comforts her. Apparently they haven't revealed their engagement yet because everything is up in the air, so Anya is stressed about that, too.

Spike is babysitting Dawn while Willow, Xander, Anya, and Tara have a meeting. Dawn tries to tell him he can leave, but he says he won't leave her to get hurt...not again. Buffybot gets into a scurmish with a vamp and he breaks a bottle over her head and runs away after seeing her short out and spark. So a vamp saw that she was a robot and now she's malfunctioning. Willow says it's "time". They "have everything". Xander lays it out: they're going to bring Buffy back. Xander is nervous, says it feels wrong. Tara agrees, but they decided. Anya suggests telling Giles, but Willow says no. Spike and Dawn aren't in the loop, either. Because Buffy was killed by mystical forces, she can be brought back, unlike Joyce who died of natural causes. Willow is worried she's in a hell dimension. Buffybot is at home when Willow gets back. She has a homing device to get back to Willow when she's injured. Willow plugs her into a computer to fix her. Buffybot apparently is plugged in to recharge at night in Buffy's old bed. Creepy. Dawn goes in at night to cuddle with her. Buffybot trains with Giles. Buffybot occasionally says something sexy to Spike, but Spike gets upset when she does. Willow has tried to get all that out of her software. Buffybot comforts Giles when he laments his role in getting her killed.

The vamp that witnessed Buffy as a bot is telling the story to a biker gang of demons. He's wearing a Hanson t shirt, by the way. Their ears perk up, they kill the vamp, and decide to invade Sunnydale.

Willow is doing a spell in the forest. She's all in white. "Come forward, Blessed One. Know your calling." A deer walks up. So cute. Willow kills it. She's upset. She doesn't tell anyone what she had to do. After she comes back from the killing, she's wearing red and a bloodstone-looking necklace that is exactly like the one she was wearing when she killed the deer, only then it was a milky-moonstone-like necklace. Clothing symbolism...love it.

Giles has left a note. He's left. They go to him at the airport to say goodbye. They all brought him cheesy gifts from the gas station on the way over. Everyone hugs him. It's super sad, especially because they're resurrecting Buffy tonight, so he really shouldn't leave right now.

Later they're at the cemetery lighting black candles. Willow has to put the deer-blood on her forehead. The spell gets scary and Xander is worried. Tara tells him Willow told her she would be "tested". They can't break the circle. The bike gang arrives. They loot and destroy. A snake crawls out of Willow's mouth. The Buffybot confronts the biker gang. They slash her open. She has to go back to Willow, you know, 'cause she's injured. They fight. She gets away and they chase her on the bikes, leading the gang to them. the spell is still going and the "urn" is broken, ending the spell. They have to get away now. Anya and Tara go in one direction and Xander and Willow in the other. Willow passes out.

You see Buffy reanimate in the coffin. It looks so cool. She was all decayed and skeletal and then refleshes and shit. Awesome. She's in the coffin though and has to break out. Why didn't they dig her up before starting the spell? She looks all scared and hoarse and her vision is blurry (they keep showing it from her POV). When Willow wakes up Xander tells her that the last urn got broken and Willow has to accept that Buffy is really gone. It's heartbreaking. They're going to meet back up at the magic shop. Dawn is watching the destruction from the window and Spike keeps having to pull her away. He realizes the biker gang must be there because they know Sunnydale is vulnerable.

Buffy gets out of her grave. Ok, she's not in a cemetery...just the woods. They had her hidden, so that's why they could keep her death a secret. Her hair is longer and darker too, which makes sense, 'cause your hair grows when you're dead. She's wandering Sunnydale now. Everything is destroyed and on fire, probably unrecognizable to her blurry vision. Anya and Tara get back to the magic shop before Willow and Xander. Anya is freaking out and Tara comforts her and does a spell to send a little light to Willow to guide her back to them. They were lost, so that's helpful.

Buffy is very disoriented by stimuli, which is a nice touch. She's really acting like she's just come back from the dead. Spike and Dawn are on foot. Spike steals a motorcycle from one of the demons and they get on. Xander and Willow get back to the magic shop. They need to find Spike and Dawn. Anya wants to know how they're supposed to handle the sitch without Buffybot, Giles, or Spike.

Buffy wanders up to the gang as they're about to take the bot apart. I bet that looks weird. They delimb the bot and go after the real Buffy. She's able to run, at least. Anya, Willow, Tara, and Xander are out looking for Spike and Dawn. Tara is telling Willow perhaps they weren't "supposed" to save Buffy, fate-wise. They run into Buffy. They think it's the bot at first, then she runs, sort of rocking in a corner of an alley. Xander realizes she had to crawl out of the grave. She is confused and scared. She's not responding to them. Some of the biker dudes show up just as they're getting eye contact with her. As the gang is threatening to rape the women, Buffy starts fighting. There are a lot of them, but she's handling herself well. I think she's been back a few hours at this point. Spike and Dawn find the bot without limbs. The bot says the other Buffy was there and then ran away. Dawn runs. Spike was distracted by trying to find the bot's pieces. Buffy bests the biker dudes and then runs away. One of the biker dudes isn't dead, but together they kill him. Buffy goes to the tower. Dawn somehow knows she'll be there. This time Dawn has to save Buffy. She's confused and thinks she needs to jump off again. The tower is falling apart. Buffy asks if this is hell. Things were so "clear" when last she was here. Dawn keeps pleading with her to walk toward her and get off the tower. She doesn't react until Dawn is in immediate peril and she saves her. The tower self destructs.

Dawn hugs her and says "you're home". She does not look happy about it.

Commentary (by Marti Noxon and David Fury) notes added 5.11.13: They're talking about how Buffy/Sarah's hair is honey-blonde (less platinum) post-death, talking about how that's perplexing that her hair would change color in the grave, etc, but I think that works. I always thought it was an intentional touch, like her hair had dulled in death. They also talk about how the knock-knock joke in the teaser fell flat and "didn't work", but I TOTALLY think it did. 

"When we bring Buffy back, we're going to earn it." -Joss

Again, talking about a scene that "didn't work", but it did! Marti Noxon needs some more confidence, man. Perhaps what she means is that things don't look how she imagined them in her head when she wrote them. She's oddly obsessed with Anya's hair looking like Buffy's. It's mucch blonder and more '70s. I don't think it's confusing. Marti, Marti, Marti. Everything is just fine. 

Alyson had a really hard time during the deer-slaughter scene. They said she was crying a lot. Makes me wanna cry. Originally Dawn was going to be 9ish. Sooo glad Joss talked them out of that. Marti talks about Willow's wardrobe change after killing the deer (from light blue to red). Yes! I was JUST about to write that they weren't mentioning it. 

As Buffy is Carrie-ing it through the streets after digging out of her grave Marti mentions the chaos around her is an externalization of the inner chaos and confusion of her mind, not knowing where they are. 

Ugh, they are constantly complaining about shots that didn't work and things that had to be re-shot and places they screwed up and they're invariably things I don't think they screwed up and it's devaluing the work. Honestly...should I stop watching the commentaries that aren't Joss? Perhaps I will pick and choose from now on. If it's Marti and Fury, no thank you. If it's Solomon (but it won't be because he came in on 6 I think), maybe. If it's someone I haven't seen do a commentary, yes. But to write five paragraghs in an hour and a half of watching?! And I'm bored? I've never been much of a commentary-watcher. I enjoy hearing tidbits, etc and even watching the show while listening to the commentary...I know what it is! I hate hearing the sound of the show. I would like the sound of the people doing the commentary and the visual of the show and NO OTHER SOUND. Yeah. That's exactly why I've been hating all of these commentaries. That makes so much more sense. Ok, here's the deal. If it's writers I haven't seen before (or Joss) I'll watch. However, if the guys I've not seen before are not interesting me and I'm spacing within the first 15 minutes, I can bail. This time, I'm oly ten minutes away from the end, so I'll go on, but that will be the new plan. Because I just haven't been engaged during this process. I'm ready to watch other special features and catch up on the comic book, but I don't want to do that until I finish the commentaries. There's a precise order in my head of what I want to do. I have a list, damnit, and there needs to be order!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Gift.

episode 100.
airdate: 22 May 2001.

And now the dramatic conclusion of season 5 of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"...

In interviews, commentaries, etc, Joss has said that they didn't yet know if there would be seasons after 5. They usually didn't know if the end of any season would be the end of the series, in fact, so they tried to treat the end of any season as if it were the bookend for the end of the entire show. I think that's smart. This is their 100th episode and it truly does feel like the end of the series.

It begins with a typical vampire slaying. A boy is being chased by a vampire and Buffy saves him after some righteous Buffy-bantering. The boy asks, "How'd you do that? You're just a girl." Buffy answers, "That's what I keep saying." Buffy makes Giles explain the situation again. "The Key is energy and needs to flow into a specific place at a specific time." Tara says she has "places to be!" They still have a couple of hours. Buffy says "we are NOT talking about this" (talking about having to kill Dawn if the thing starts). Giles yells, "Yes, we BLOODY well are!" Buffy is not willing to sacrifice Dawn. Giles says we'll all die, including Dawn, if the ritual starts, so why save her if she's about to die anyway? I agree. Buffy is being pretty close-minded on this point. Xander suggests killing Ben...then takes it back. Giles doesn't think Ben will surface this close to the ritual. They really only need to distract her until the time has passed. Anya suggests using the troll hammer ("want to fight a god? use the weapon of a god!") and the Dagon Sphere she found when they first encountered Glory. Perhaps it distracts her? They still don't know how to find Glory. At this point Tara continues rambling about how she has somewhere important to be, as she has been for awhile now and everyone's ignored her. Duh. Let her lead them to Dawn/Glory. Ok, they have a plan. Distract Glory with Dagon Sphere and troll hammer.

Ben presents Dawn with a ritual dress to wear. She yells at him to change to Glory. She would rather deal with her because she's upfront about being a monster. Buffy is training, though wouldn't you want to reserve your energy? Giles asks her that. She's got righteous rage on her side. Giles reassures Buffy that he loves Dawn, but sometimes he has to say and do what other people can't. Buffy tells him she'll stop him if he tries to hurt Dawn.

Buffy: How many Apocalypses is this now?
Giles: Six...at least.

I count seven, and I do have a list if you don't believe me. ;)

Buffy says when she sacrificed Angel she knew it was right, but she doesn't know how to live in a world if THESE are the choices...anymore. She tells Giles she's quitting being a Slayer if Dawn dies.

Anya and Xander are looking for the Dagon Sphere in the basement of the magic shop after having sex. Anya is terrified. This is the first time she's not run away during an Apocalypse. They find the Buffybot. Xander proposes and Anya slaps him. She thinks he's doing it because the world is about to end and he won't have to follow through. He says he's doing it because the world is not going to end, but she tells him to repropose when the world doesn't end.

They're all still trying to come up with ideas to distract Glory. Willow has an idea to possibly restore Tara's mind and perhaps it will slow down Glory for a sec. Buffy brings Spike to her place, barking orders at him, but he stops in the doorway, 'cause you know, he's been uninvited. She reinvites him...it's a moment. Buffy tells Spike "we're not all gonna make it." That she's counting on him to protect Dawn.  "I know you'll never love me. I know that I'm a monster, but you treat me like a man." That's sweet, but usually she doesn't treat him "like a man."

Dawn is already tied up at the top of a makeshift tower. It's time to go. Buffy tells everyone she'll kill anyone who lays a hand on Dawn. Not the best Buffy speech ever...

As they arrive, Glory asks Tara what she's doing there and Willow does the spell to restore Tara's mind.  It does distract her, because she needs a brain to eat now. Buffy is there with the Dagon Sphere, throws it to her. Glory crushes it, but she's disoriented. Anya is beating minions with a bat. The minions are guarding the bottom of the stairs leading to Dawn. Everyone is fighting them. Willow goes to check on Tara. She's back. Willow tells her she'll always find her.

Glory regains her composure and says she's bored and lops off Buffy's head. It's the bot. The real B is behind her and hits her with the troll hammer. She starts running up to the top of the tower as Glory is regrouping. There's lots of fighting on the way up the rickety tower. They fall back to the bottom. Xander hits Glory with a wrecking ball. The creepy-magic guy shows up at the top of the tower. Why did no one go to guard Dawn? Giles thinks no one has gotten up there. Willow speaks to Spike in his mind, tells him to get up there NOW. She creates a path in the crazies and minions magically, with Tara.

The guy stabs Spike and throws him off the tower. Buffy is beating the HOLY CRAP out of Glory, then she turns to Ben. Buffy can't kill Ben, but Giles can. He suffocates Ben. Creepy magic demon guy cuts Dawn as Buffy gets to her and pushes him off the tower. They're walking away as Dawn notices the portal has opened. Crazy shit is already happening just from a few drops of Dawn's blood. Dawn tries to jump into the portal, but Buffy won't let her. Buffy suddenly realizes that their blood is the same, so she could jump instead of Dawn. "Death is your gift". Dawn realizes what she's going to do and protests. B talks to Dawn for a sec, kisses her, looks at her with peace and love, then jumps.

As Buffy is writhing in the portal, a voiceover of what she said to Dawn plays: "Dawn, listen to me...listen. I love you. I will always love you. This is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles I figured it out, and I'm ok. Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live." Everyone is crying and staring at B dead in the rubble. Her face is that of peace, though. Her gravestone says "Beloved sister. Devoted friend. She saved the world...a lot."